Situations when parents impose their dreams on their children

Parents fabricate a dream world and imagine how the whole life of their child should be, even before he/she is born. Most of these expectations are social, moral and ethical and should be inculcated undoubtedly. Needless to say, parents obviously desire the best for their child. They are very protective and want a secure future for him/her. In a bid to provide the best parental care, parents want their child to follow the prospect they have planned for him/her. The innocent being is unaware of the unseen burden that has been put onto him the very moment he/she was born. And more often than not, their dreams come to clash with the reality.
Keeping the other things at bay, the most serious clash occurs in terms of career. We often hear parents proudly declaring to make their child a doctor or engineer or IAS/IPS, military officer. These are the regular dream careers parents have for their child and are reasoned by the fact that all these are promising career choices.
But when the child wants to opt for a stream that the parents have not envisioned for him/her, problems arise. Parents go against the child’s choice of subject and force them to opt for the one they want. They want the child to pursue courses that suit the norms and sometimes leave the child helpless and do as they say. The clash is especially frequent when children opt for ‘out of the league’ and risky careers like modelling, singing, being an artist etc. These choices harbour a lot of struggle and increased chances of failure, hence parents are afraid of them and try to force their child to move on the path that they feel is secure.
In any case, the result is unforeseen. The child is forced to study and work those subjects that he/she has no interest in. This leads to lack of efficiency and loss of productivity. Despite having capabilities, the child is not able to give optimum performance. Apart from this, some children tend to inculcate depressive traits. They may become reserved and get detached from their parents at some place. The path to success in a forced career seems more difficult and the child often gives in to the hurdles. Any failure leads to the blaming of the consequences to the parents. A gap of beliefs and thinking emerges that keeps on growing with every passing day. A clash of interests and dreams leaves instability in the career and the life of children.
Parents need to realise that though their ultimate goal is to ensure a secure future for their child, but imposing their dreams is not the solution. Let the mind and cognition of the child develop. Parents can become the ultimate channel of guidance when they co-operate with their child’s dreams. Mere support of parents is enough to clear any obstacle that arises in the path of the child.


Submitted by:
Name : Nudrat Huda Khan
Course: M.Sc. Biosciences IV Sem
College Name: Jamia Millia Islamia,  New Delhi

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